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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25008238">Beverly Marsh is Capable of Love</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/cherrybombloser/pseuds/cherrybombloser'>cherrybombloser</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Loser Club Headcanon Fics [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Ben Hanscom Loves Beverly Marsh, Ben Hanscom is a Good Friend, Beverly Marsh Deserves Nice Things, Beverly Marsh Lives With Her Aunt, Beverly Marsh Loves Ben Hanscom, Beverly Marsh Stays in Derry, Bisexual Ben Hanscom, F/M, Polyamory, Tags Contain Spoilers, Underage Smoking</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 05:20:48</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,611</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25008238</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/cherrybombloser/pseuds/cherrybombloser</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Beverly Marsh realizes Alvin Marsh's views of love were just that; his views, not hers</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Loser Club Headcanon Fics [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1798108</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Beverly Marsh is Capable of Love</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Warnings: Brief mention of child abuse</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Beverly twisted her hair absentmindedly while reading through her science notebook. Her aunt, now that she lived with her, had set specific hours throughout the day for studying. Originally, it was frustrating, but now the sense of normalcy was welcoming to the teen.</p><p>She tugged lightly on the lock of hair before suddenly noticing that the piece reached about her shoulder. Pausing in her studying, she brushed both hands through the red strands. </p><p>Her lips parted and she quickly stood up, knocking her chair backwards noisily. Rushing to the mirror leaning against her wall, she gasped. She hadn't really noticed it until now, but her hair was growing longer than she realized. Longer, more like how boys, like how her Father, expected it to be.</p><p>She scrambled for the corded phone laying on her bedside table, muttering a whispered curse. Grabbing the phone, she quickly dialled the first number she thought of.</p><p>"Hello?" Ben's voice filled her ears and she felt a slight calm come over her. "New Kid! Hey, can you come over? I need, I need a quick hair trim and figured you'd be the best to ask." She couldn't help but imagine Richie trying to cut her hair and winced. "Yeah, you're definitely the best."</p><p>She couldn't hear Ben's beaming smile through the phone. "Of course! Give me like three minutes, 10 tops if I have to bike!" Agreeing, Bev hung up and sat on her bed, clutching her curls.</p><p>Glancing up, Bev spied her cigarettes and quickly snatched them up, heading to her window to smoke. Lighting it up, she inhaled the warm smoke, feeling her body relax slightly at the familiar feeling. She enjoyed the buzz she felt after a few drags, not having smoked for a few days due to being busy with the Losers.</p><p>A knock on her bedroom door drew her attention and she quickly snuffed the cigarette out, glancing at the clock as Ben shuffled in. "Seven minutes, quick biking dude." Ben smiled sheepishly before placing a bag onto her bed.</p><p>"I brought some hair stuff, can you sit at your vanity chair?" Nodding, Bev plopped herself down, stretching slightly. "I just want it to be the shortness of when I did the first time, though maybe something added." Ben stepped up behind her, paused, and then turned and shuffled through his bag again. "I've got an idea, as long as you're fine with a surprise." </p><p>Bev grinned into the mirror. "Fuck yeah! Lemme spin around so I can't see the mirror." She grabbed the chair and spun around, and Ben shuffled around her to work on her hair.</p><p>The sound of scissors snipping at her curls brought her relief, and she let out a soft sigh. Ben's hands were gentle, and when he came to knots when combing her hair he was careful to comb them out. When he had to shift her head, he'd grab the side of her hair and slowly and softly move it, giving her enough time to react if she needed to.</p><p>Feeling the softness of Ben, in both his hands and personality, she couldn't help but compare the Losers to her late father, the thoughts making her feel calmer somehow.</p><p>Ben was the complete opposite of her father. Where her father was all sharp, loud, and scary, Ben was soft, quiet yet outspoken, and calming. He made her feel safe, like home, like the warm hugs her mom used to give her. Where her father was painful, bruising, Ben was soft and gentle. He was someone that could heal all your pain, even for a little bit, just by smiling at you. When he raised his voice it was for something he truly cared about, like when he ranted about New Kids on the Block and different house patterns. </p><p>Richie and Eddie, while they were loud, it wasn't like the loud of her father. Her father was loud like ice, freezing and sharp enough to cut. His loud was pure insults, pure, cold anger and pain. Richie and Eddie were loud and insulting, but everyone knew they never meant what they said. Their loud was warm, not enough to burn, but enough to feel comforting. It was friendly, sibling like teasing and backtracking when going to far.</p><p>Stanley was sharp as well, and slightly cold. But, they was the sharpness of someone who is looking out for others, like when Eddie and them freak out about greywater and jumping from the quary. It's a sharp you need to keep you safe. And their coldness is like a cold lemonade on hot summer days. It's a comfort, something that shows how much they care when they share small smiles to the losers, or makes jokes only they would understand but everyone (even Richie) loves. </p><p>Bill and her father both her people who noticed everything, who cared too much. The difference between them, however, was Bill was selfless in most things, and Alvin was selfish in everything. Bill cared because he truly loved the losers. He wanted to see them safe and strong. He noticed things because if he didn't, then who did? Who could help Stan find shower caps because he noticed the teen was nervous e about the spiders. Alvin only cares because if Beverly was gone, his plaything would be gone too.</p><p>And Mike was similar to Ben, being almost nothing like Alvin. The only similarity they shared was their recklessness. And even then, they were a different type of reckless. Mike was a reckless that only showed when it came to his family, the Losers, and the animals on the farm. He was reckless to save them, like when he fought Bowers in the Neibolt house. Alvin was reckless because he left marks and scars on Beverly.</p><p>Beverly's thoughts drifted to Ben, the absolute sweetheart of the group. How he cared for all of them, and how he fought through his pain during the fight with Pennywise. They all did, but Ben was bleeding from before he fought the clown. He was brave and sweet and kind and-</p><p>And Beverly didn't understand how she felt anymore. She cared about him differently than the rest of the Losers, except for maybe Bill. She saw them all as siblings except for Bill and Ben. But, she couldn't love them, any of them, because love was different, right? It was like how Alvin loved her. But, Mrs. Kaspbrak "loved" Eddie as well, and it was different.</p><p>She frowned. She didn't understand how it worked. Alvin loved her. Eddie's mom loved him. All the losers parents loved them. Her aunt loved her. She loved the Losers, at least she thinks it's love. </p><p>But how come they all treated love differently?</p><p>"Fuck" she ground out, and Ben froze. She had zoned out and forgot her was there. "Oh! Did I hurt you?" Ben pulled her hands away only for Beverly to shake her head. "No! Not at all! I'm just thinking." After a pause, Ben went back to cutting her hair. </p><p>"Do you want to talk about it?" Bev thought for a second before sighing. "It's just, you love your mom, and she loves you too, right?" Ben nodded, a confused look in his face though she couldn't see it. "Well, yeah? And I love you and the Losers too." Beverly frowned deeper. "But, you don't, you don't act the same." Ben tilted his head, shaking some hair off his hand.</p><p>"Of course I don't. Love doesn't fit in one specific way, if that's what you mean. Like, there's sibling love, like how I see the losers. There's platonic, romantic, parental, and more. And, you also don't have to love your parents, I'm just going to point that out." Beverly's mouth hung open very slightly. Her thoughts turned and tumbled. </p><p>She struggled with how to respond. "So, so what you mean is, not everyone loves the same? Not everyone, not every love is, is, is violent." Ben took in a sharp breath and paused, placing his scissors down to kneel in front of her. "Beverly, everyone has different views on love, especially for different people. Love doesn't fit into one box. And love, it's never, never violent in the way your father was." Beverly felt herself tear up and lunged at the boy, wrapping him in a hug. He fell backwards slightly, hugging her tightly as she let a few tears go.</p><p>Pulling back, she stared at Ben. The silence was calm, and not awkward. "Ben, what if- can you love more than one person, romantically?" Ben smiled softly. "Of course. Actually, I've been meaning to talk to you about something like that." Beverly smiled, finally sure of her feelings.</p><p>Not letting Ben finish, she surged forward, kissing Ben softly. It was gentle and sweet and pure. His lips were softer than she expected, and he gently touched her cheek with his hand. Pulling back, they smiled at each other. "You and Bill," they whispered at the same time before falling into a fit of giggles. </p><p>Ben stood up, grabbing her hand and hauling her up. He smiles before spinning her around slightly, and she gasped at her hair. "Ben..." Her normally full, crazy red hair was trimmed enough to frame her face, and then the sides were shaved to make a mullet. It fit her face somehow, and the fringe showed off her eyes more than usual.</p><p>Fiddling with his fingers, Ben stumbled out "do you like it?" Spinning around, she locked him in another embrace. "I fucking love it dude."</p><p>Beverly felt at peace, complete peace for the first time in a while. She felt loved.</p>
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